When you’ve been on one or a few dates with a guy and all of a sudden, you don’t hear from him anymore, it can feel pretty disappointing. But instead of wracking your brain trying  to figure out why he’s not calling, try to focus your brain on other things.

First of all, realize that the reason he isn’t calling or stopped calling could be one of many, many reasons, but likely boils down to one key thing: He doesn’t want to. For whatever reason, be it he thought you two were not as compatible as you thought, or he met someone new, or he’s busy, or whatever, the point is that if he wanted to call you, he would make time for calling you and do it.

So what to do when you realize he’s not calling you anymore? Distract yourself. Catch that cheesy romantic comedy that you wanted to see. Get dinner from your favorite place. Bake cookies. Go to the library and get a new book to skim through.

Whatever you do, don’t call him back first. If a guy is giving you the clear message that he is not interested enough to call you, one of the worst things you can do is present yourself as needy and insecure by calling him multiple times trying to figure out what is wrong.